Why do you love me as a friend, but look for me

Sometimes, the line between friendship and the feeling that the other person feels something else can be difficult to distinguish. It is possible that throughout our life we ​​have encountered confusing situations in which someone assures us that it only sees us as friends, but at the same time seeks our company and attention constantly. This contradiction can baffle us and make us question the intentions of that person and more if there are not only feelings of friendship on our part.

¿Why do you love me as a friend, but look for me? In this psychology-online article we will talk about the possible reasons behind this behavior, we will provide you with key signals to help you differentiate if you want only as a friend and we will explain how to handle this situation in the best possible way for both parties.

1. Why look for me if you just want to be my friend
2. How to know if you just want to be your friend
3. What to do if you love me as a friend, but look for me

Why look for me if you just want to be my friend

When someone constantly seeks you despite telling you that you just want your friendship may seem an emotional contradiction. To better understand this situation we must enter the characteristics of relationships and psychology behind them.

• Nature of relationships: First, it is essential to remember that relationships are not always simple or linear. Friendship and affection can coexist, and people often experience a variety of feelings towards others, even if they initially seek a friendship relationship.
• Attraction is not always romantic: When someone is constantly looking for you, it does not necessarily imply that they have a romantic interest in you. Attraction can manifest in different ways, such as a deep appreciation for your personality, values ​​or even your company in general. You can love how you treat you, but that does not mean that you have an interest beyond friendship.
• Emotional ambiguity: Sometimes people may not be safe from their own feelings or can feel a mixture of emotions. They can value friendship, but at the same time, experience an attraction that they do not understand completely, so they prefer not to go further until they are completely safe.
• Fear of losing connection: The constant search for your company can be an indication that they deeply value the connection with you and fear losing it. They may feel that being close to you enriches their lives and gives them a sense of well -being and security even though they want nothing more with you.
• Lack of labels: On some occasions, people can avoid labeling a relationship not to put pressure on it. They prefer to let the dynamics flow naturally and do not want to put restrictions on the relationship they are building.
• Friendship: Friendship is a valuable and significant relationship. In fact, a good friendship can be very difficult to find. Some people may be looking to cultivate and strengthen their friendship with you because they value that relationship pleasantly.

If you have more doubts about this topic you can also read ¿I liked it or I am imagining it?

How to know if you just want to be your friend

Identify if someone just wants to be your friend, despite constantly looking for your company or attention, it can be a complicated task. However, they exist that can help you better understand their intentions with you. Here are some key signals that can indicate that someone just wants to be your friend.

• Friendship behavior: Observe if your general behavior reflects a solid friendship. This includes emotional support in difficult times, mutual trust and the willingness to give you your time, no comments or flirting that may make you suspect that you are looking for a romantic relationship
• Talk about another person you like: If you openly mention other love interests, you are likely to be focused on maintaining only one friendship with you ¿Is putting you to test? Most likely not, although sometimes we want to convince ourselves.
• Introduces you to your friends: If you introduce you to your social circle and consider you an important part of your life, this is a solid sign that your friendship pleasantly values ​​and considers that you can fit with them.
• They do not show flirting signs: Avoid flirting or any romantic behavior with you. If you do not show romantic interest or a gesture that can insinuate something else, you are likely to only be friends.
• They don't look for physical contact: The absence of physical contact attempts, such as hugs, kisses or subtle caresses, are an indication that the person feels comfortable by maintaining a purely friendly relationship and nothing else.
• He tells you that he appreciates you as a friend: open conversations about their feelings and expectations are usually clear signs that you are only interested in your friendship. If they clearly express that they value the friendship relationship, it is important to take their words seriously. Sometimes our hope or feelings are so great that we can think that it doesn't really say it for any reason.
• It does not show jealousy towards you: Do not feel jealous of your relationship with other people is usually an indication that the person is committed to maintaining a friendly relationship without romantic expectations. Most likely, be interested in you because he appreciates you and wants to see you happy with a person who deserves you.

In the following article we explain how to know if my friend likes.

What to do if you love me as a friend, but look for me

If you are in a situation in which someone loves you as a friend, but constantly seeks you, it is important to handle this situation to avoid misunderstandings and take care of the relationship. Some issues you can consider:

• Establishes a clear and sincere communication: Start a clear and sincere conversation with the person you like to clarify their intentions and expectations in the relationship. Ask him directly why he looks for you so frequently and what he feels when he is with you.
• Express your feelings: Share your own feelings and thoughts about the relationship and what that person means for you. Be sincere about your expectations so that both are in the same line.
• Listen actively: pay attention to what the other person has to say. Listen to their way of thinking and explanations so that you can have a deeper understanding of their actions and the reasons for these. Here we explain what active listening is: characteristics, exercises and examples.
• Evaluate your feelings: Reflect on your own feelings towards this person. ¿You are comfortable with your friendship? ¿You feel pressured or uncomfortable for your constant search? If not, maybe it would be positive to communicate it and take some time to recover.
• Establish limits: If you feel that the person is crossing limits or constantly confuses you, do not hesitate to establish clear limits. Let him know how you prefer the relationship in the event that you just want your friendship.
• Consider your perspective: Try to understand the perspective of the person and the reasons behind their behavior. There may be reasons that are not evident to the naked eye, but that explain the reasons behind their confusing behavior.
• It offers alternatives: If the person looks for your company because you enjoy your friendship, you can offer alternatives to spend time together in a way that you feel comfortable. You could start going out in a group or being less frequently than now to be able to protect your feelings.
• Be honest: If after the conversation it is clear that the person seeks a relationship of friendship and you do not share those feelings, be honest when expressing your limits, but respecting their feelings. That they love you as a friend is something very valuable, since good friends are not easily found.
• Evaluate the relationship: Consider if the relationship is healthy and satisfactory for both parties. If you feel that this situation is causing you more discomfort that happiness may be necessary to reassess the relationship as a whole.
• Find support: If you feel confused, consider talking to a trusted person or a therapist to obtain guidance on how to handle the situation. Sometimes, other views can be of great help to see beyond what you see at a given time.

This article is merely informative, in psychology-online we have no power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to Why do you love me as a friend, but look for me, We recommend that you enter our category of feelings.