People with double life personality and consequences

Infidelity, love triangles and double life are very controversial issues and constitute one of the most frequent consultation reasons for couple attention. It is full of studies everywhere, but it is still a mystery why people are unfaithful. ¿What is the personality of people who maintain a double life? ¿What leads them to look out of the relationship? ¿Why do they? ¿This type of people can change? ¿What do they lack and what can be the consequences of a person leading a double life, for them and for their partners?

In this psychology-online article, we will talk about the People with double life, their personality and the consequences.We will see the possible reasons that can lead to someone to look outside the relationship and try to understand a little after that need.

1. Person profile that leads a double love life
2. Why are there people who maintain parallel relationships?
3. Psychological consequences of a double life

Person profile that leads a double love life

Next, we will make a list of behaviors to be able to elaborate a complete psychological profile of a person with a double love life:

• They are people who hide a emotional immaturity and that they possess Affective deficiencies that hinder the connection and ability to establish intimate, deep and stable ties.
• Really, They are not affectively available. They are people who are not ready to commit, with all that that implies, or to be affectively responsible with their partners.
• Are insecure of themselves And they have low self -esteem. Despite demonstrating the opposite to the outside, after the safety and power shell, a person with many insecurities is hidden.
• They usually have communication problems and be people who Avoid conflict loving; either because it makes them feel uncomfortable, because they do not know what to do or because they do not have the necessary tools. They usually depart when something does not like or looking for what they need on the outside, before requesting their partner.
• They do not know their needs And they hope your partner identifies them and communicates them or satisfies them.
• Have unreal expectations In the relationship with the other. They find it hard to see the other, like an "other" and unconsciously ask him to be or behave as an extension of themselves. When the other acts differently from them (from their "otherness"; with values, ways of being and different beliefs) they feel disappointed.
• Are excessively demanding. They are people who have a lack or need not covered in childhood and who seek to fill it without knowing how. At the couple level it seems that they never manage to feel satisfied and something is always missing in the relationship.
• Tend to idealize and devalue. It is difficult for them to perce.
• They need reaffirm constantly Through others, be loved, accepted, like and seduce to feel good about themselves.

Why are there people who maintain parallel relationships?

Let's look at the possible causes of leading a double love life:

• Fidelity is not natural. First of all, I think it is important to mention that it is not so easy to be faithful, since it is not something that gives us natural. Fidelity is a decision that is sustained with great effort And not all people are clear about what they want (they think they are clear but it is not always so) and when we don't know what we want, it becomes much more difficult to sustain our decisions and be consistent and consistent with them, what makes us More likely to doubt or fall into temptations.
• Being faithful to another, sometimes, is not in line to be faithful to oneself. If we see a relationship as a continuous construction, with high and low that they are presented permanently, we find that there will be certain occasions in some moments where our wishes will not be in accordance with the commitments acquired when they are as a couple and there will be to opt, and in this process there are those who will choose to remain faithful to themselves, who will decide to be faithful to their partner and others who will find strategies to put both balance.
• The desire continues to exist. As Rolon says, the strength of desire is put into play, which will always exist, as more in love than we are. A person will always appear at some point that generates desire and in this sense the "faithful lover" has to free a battle with his own temptations in pursuit of something he considers better for him.
• THE PSYCHOEMOCIONAL STABILITY PREMISE. Being able to establish faithful, healthy and permanent ties over time, requires a "backup" that we not all achieved satisfactorily in our childhood. People who maintain parallel relationships are people with many offenses and deficiencies and also people who did not learn what they need to respond with fidelity rather than with infidelity.
• The experiences lived. Our history conditions our type of elections and the type of dynamics that we establish with others. A person who holds a double life has learned many of those things that today repeats unconsciously and compulsively and that is why it is very possible to find in their history a history of infidelities or the associated features such as Lack of limits, inability to communicate and be treated and understood, difficulty solving conflicts with another, silenced needs, etc. That is why we could say that infidelity on the one hand is chosen and on the other it suffers, and therefore we must take charge, at the conscious level, of everything we drag.

Psychological consequences of a double life

People who maintain a double life and are discovered or for some reason they confess their infidelity they have to face reality and that implies becoming aware of their actions and their consequences. Everything has a cost and the fact of breaking the couple's agreement generates significant damage in each of the parties and in the relationship.

• Relationship termination. The person who has been unfaithful must accept and take charge aware that their actions have consequences and among them accept that damage to their partner and that product of this, is most likely that the relationship is terminated or looked strongly affected by the trust and your own dignity gets into play. This is one of the reasons why many of the people who are unfaithful then decide to keep the secret, rather than assume everything that can mean the fact of telling the truth.
• Damage to the couple. The couple affected by this infidelity will also experience psychological consequences. First, experience will generate a lot.
• Distrust. At the level of the couple link, this will also be affected since the confidence in the relationship will be seriously injured. In most cases, the relationship ends, but sometimes couples decide Professional to avoid unconsciously more damage to any of the affected parts. In this article we talk about how to recover confidence in your partner.

This article is merely informative, in psychology-online we have no power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to People with double life: personality and consequences, We recommend that you enter our category of couple therapy.