My partner does what he wants, what can I do?

My partner does what he wants, what can I do?

In the arduous world of couple relationships, we must sometimes face difficult situations that we don't know very well how to manage. One of the situations that affects many couples at some point in their relationship is the feeling that our partner does what he wants, without considering our needs or well -being, which can generate frustration, confusion and doubts about the future of the relationship.

My partner does what he wants, ¿What I can do? In this psychology-online article we will talk about the reasons behind this behavior and we will provide advice and strategies to address the situation effectively.

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  1. Why does my partner do what he wants
  2. When to worry if my partner does what they want
  3. What to do if my partner does what he wants

Why does my partner do what he wants

Do not understand why a couple acts independently and does what he wants without considering the desires or needs of the other can generate great discomfort in the person who suffers from it. Therefore, then we leave you an analysis of the possible reasons behind this behavior to address it effectively.

  • Lack of communication: On many occasions, the root of this behavior is in lack of communication and a lack of agreement. In this case, it is essential to establish a friendly and clear dialogue to express your desires and expectations in the relationship. Here we explain how to improve communication in the couple.
  • Differences in personality: personality differences can also play an important role in this situation. Some people have a more independent and autonomous nature, while others tend to be more dependent and considered. Understanding and accepting these differences is essential to avoid conflicts.
  • Lack of compromise: In some cases, this behavior can be an indication of a lack of commitment in the relationship. Your partner may not be completely compromised or feel that the relationship is not their priority at this time. This requires a serious conversation about the objectives and expectations in the relationship.
  • Personal space need: It is important to remember that all people need their personal space and moments of autonomy. Your partner could be looking for time to grow or simply to do things you like. This is healthy as long as it is balanced with the commitment and consideration towards the relationship. In the following art how to tell your partner that you need space
  • Unresolved conflicts: Sometimes, this type of behavior can be a response to discussions that have not been resolved in the relationship. If there have been frequent problems, your partner may act independently as a way of emotionally protecting a situation that causes pain.
  • Personal stress or problems: personal problems or stress outside the relationship can also influence your partner's behavior. Sometimes, the need for independence can be a way to deal with personal or emotional problems.

When to worry if my partner does what they want

At this point it is important to distinguish between healthy independence and problematic behavior. Here are some signals that can indicate when it is appropriate to worry.

  • Lack of compromise: If you notice that your partner shows an almost total lack of commitment in the relationship and seems not to import your needs or how you feel, it is a reason for concern. The commitment is fundamental in a relationship, and if you do not feel that you have it on the other hand at any time, it could indicate that there are deeper problems.
  • Constant disconsideration: If your partner consistently acts in a inconsiderate and selfish way, without worrying about how their actions affect you, it is a clear sign that you should worry about. Consideration and respect for the other are fundamental in a healthy relationship.
  • Lack of communication: If the lack of communication is a pattern in the relationship and your partner makes important decisions without consulting or without informing you, it implies that perhaps it no longer feels that their opinion is important for him. Open communication and joint decision making are essential in a solid relationship.
  • Denial: If your partner denies the existence of problems or avoids talking about any restlessness or conflict in the relationship, it can be worrying. Constant denial can hinder problem solving and joint growth.
  • Emotional isolation: If you feel that your partner has become emotionally distant and seems to be avoiding the intimacy of any kind with you, it is a matter of concern. Intimacy and emotional connection are pillars
  • Harmful behavior: If your partner's behavior causes you physical, emotional or psychological damage, it is a clear sign of concern. You should never tolerate abuse in a relationship and seek essential help in such cases.

What to do if my partner does what he wants

If you feel that your partner does what he wants without considering your needs or the well -being of the relationship, it is important to address this situation in a clear and constructive way. Here are some tips on how to act if you are in this situation.

  • Communicate: The first step is to have an honest and open conversation with your partner. Express your feelings and concerns with respect and clarity. Also listen to your perspective to understand the reasons behind your behavior.
  • Establish limits: In conversation, it is important to establish healthy limits in the relationship. Explain your expectations and needs, and make sure they both agree as to what is acceptable and what is not. In this article we explain how to put limits on relationships.
  • Find your commitment: Look for mutual commitments in the relationship. This implies finding solutions that work for both and being willing to give in certain aspects to achieve a balance in the relationship.
  • Listen with empathy: Try to understand the reasons behind your partner's behavior. There may be reasons such as stress or personal concerns, which are contributing to their independent attitude. Foster empathy can help find solutions together.
  • Keep a continuous communication: Communication is not only a single isolated conversation, but a continuous process in a relationship. Keep communicating regularly about your feelings, needs and expectations as the relationship evolves.
  • Consult a therapist: If tensions persist and you can't solve problems on your own, consider looking for the help of a couple therapist. A professional can give you guidance and tools for the problems of the relationship to be faced in a healthy way for both.
  • Think about your needs: Reflect on your own expectations and needs in the relationship. Make sure they are realistic and that you are not demanding too much from your partner. Communication will help you adjust these expectations if necessary.
  • Keep your independence: Although it is important to address the problem, it is also essential to maintain your own independence and continue doing things you enjoy on your own. This can help you feel more balanced in the relationship.
  • Consider rupture: In extreme cases where lack of commitment or harmful behavior persists, it is important to consider whether the relationship is really healthy for you. Sometimes, it may be necessary to make the difficult decision to follow separate paths so that both can be happy and have the opportunity to find a person who gives them what they need in a relationship.

This article is merely informative, in psychology-online we have no power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

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