Homosexuality in adolescence how to get out of the closet

With adolescence the greatest changes and transformations come that we will pass throughout our life, it is a fundamental physical, psychological and social evolutionary process And a crucial moment for the identity construction. Also at this stage in which our sexual orientation is defined.

Identify as homosexual, bisexual or transgender And to say it openly to people, what is known as 'leaving the closet', it is not just a simple action, it is a process, often complicated, to reach an agreement with our own sexuality and then reveal it to others. This may take years, and value is needed.

Content

• When does the process begin?
• The sexual orientation of the adolescent and bullying
• Get out of the closet in adolescence
• Get out of the closet at work
• Fear of rejection and value

When does the process begin?

Most people become aware of true sexual orientation between adolescence and early adulthood (around 20 years).

Fortunately, there is some more tolerance and permissiveness that twenty years ago on the issue of homosexuality, studies have shown that homosexual young people begin the process of “leaving the closet” around the age of 16, compared With the 1980s that was between 19 and 23 years old.

Many parents wonder how their teenage son can know that he is homosexual at such an early age, but the question for parents would be when they knew that they were heterosexual? In the same way they know.

But if someone is not sure how they feel about their sexuality or gender identity, there is no hurry to find out. This must be an individual decision, and it is important to do so in its own way and in its own time.

The sexual orientation of the adolescent and bullying

Stop hiding sexual orientation is usually a very positive experience, since the person feels relieved to be able to be herself, showing honest about her relationships and not having to maintain an important part of her hidden life. Unfortunately, it can also be a huge challenge. If this occurs at an early age, there is a great probability that they face bullying.

In a study conducted in Great Britain on the experiences of homosexual young people in schools, he showed that almost two thirds of those who studied secondary, about 150.000 students, experienced harassment for showing their homosexual orientation. In religious schools, it was found that the figure rose to three out of four.

It was also found that nine out of ten high school teachers said that students are currently experiencing homophobic harassment in schools, however they have never received any specific training on how to address the problem. One in five high school teachers said that you do not feel comfortable addressing homosexual issues in the classroom and one in six that does not feel safe to answer when a student calls questions about homosexual topics.

Get out of the closet in adolescence

1. Choose few people from your full confidence. To start you do not put it to tell all the people you know at once to take off the problem on you. Think that not everyone will react the same and that you must feel safe about your sexual identity so that none of those reactions makes you feel bad. Look for the right time and place, in private, to be able to tell each person.
2. Keep in mind the possible reactions. Each person is different, and sometimes someone who thought would understand you, does not have the reaction you expected. Be respectful of them, but remember, the same respect that they deserve, you deserve it. Give them the necessary time to accept the idea, put on your place, but it does not mean that you can accept intolerant behaviors. It is possible that your parents accept it more quickly, because first of all, you are their child and a sexual orientation will not change the love they feel for you, but unfortunately this does not always happen. Therefore, you have to be prepared for the difficult questions you will ask you. Try previously to give such positive answers as possible.
3. Don't be ashamed. Do not apologize for being how you are. What others say about you should not care if you are happy and you know you are doing the right thing.
4. Be prudent with your relationships with friends. If you see that they feel uncomfortable with your homosexuality, it is a matter of giving them time for them to assume it. If it doesn't happen to them, try to talk to them as soon as possible.
5. Do not insult or disrespect. Assertive techniques "I appreciate your concern, but I feel comfortable with who I am and I feel it in this way are more useful". Do not stress in excess for what you can find, initially some can cost them to assimilate it.
6. Be sincere. If before realizing your true sexual identity, you have had (or still have) a heterosexual relationship, think it is the first person you should tell. You can't miss time, because you will be cheating on you and you don't deserve this situation either.

Get out of the closet at work

Apparently a large number of homosexual people are passed through heterosexuals in the work environment, mainly to avoid comments or rejection due to their condition. But this often leads them to suffer depression and low self -esteem, as well as anxiety as a result of a fear of "being discovered".

If you are one of them and do not want to continue hiding this aspect of your life, experts advise to carry out the process in several stages:

1. First demonstrate your professionalism at work and then take the next step. Allow your colleagues to see the value of your contribution to the organization, so that if you decide to make you know better, be judged on your professional side instead of over your sexuality.
2. Identify colleagues that you think they will be more understanding with you to start. They are likely to support you against any more negative reaction that comes from others.
3. If you are asked about your relationships, it can be easier initially to use vague terms As "I am seeing someone", and then using the term "couple", which often offers people a soft track in terms of the nature of your preferences.
4. As you recognize both credibility and the friendship of your classmates, you will be able to be able to Evaluate the probable attitudes of your colleagues And know the appropriate moments to reveal more details about your personal life.

It is said that when you decide to "leave" at work, the most common is that any initial problem easily fades over time.

Fear of rejection and value

Once the person has decided to publicize his condition, he is advisable. That could be a good friend or maybe a relative, or if the person is younger, he could be a trusted adult, even a teacher.

The greatest fear of the homosexual person is rejection. For parents in turn, the news can be a complete shock, although many already have their suspicions. Anyway, they have to go through all the different types of emotions and processes before reaching the final stage of acceptance, which for some parents is extremely difficult.

The decision to "leave the closet" is very brave, since it implies an imaginary risk in our society. It definitely implies value, a value that is driven by the need to be oneself and to be accepted by how it really is, even if some people are not able to accept it.

The experience of other people who have taken the step is to take off a great weight off, and once the decision has been made, it is as if they themselves had re-discovered, according to their own words.