Interview with Ross Rosenberg, Psychotherapist expert in codependence

Conducting an interview is always a pleasure, but when you are lucky enough to do someone with international prestige, it is more no doubt. In psychoactive we wanted to know closely the great work of Ross Rosenberg, of which we attach a brief presentation:

Ross Rosenberg is a psychotherapist, educator, professional instructor and expert in codependence, narcissism, traumas and addictions. Wrote the book "The human magnet syndrome: Why do we want those who hurt us?", a Best Seller Very acclaimed that it is based on its own recovery of codependence and its 30 years of experience in the areas of mental health and social service.

Today we have a lot to tell you thanks to the time that Ross has given us for this interview.

First and first of all ross thank you very much for lending us part of your time. We know you are really a very busy person. At first glance and seeing your presentation we see that the issue of love and relationships seems to be present in reference to your work, especially in the subject of codependence.

Why love for oneself forms a main part of your work?

The love for oneself, or the lack of love for oneself, is intrinsically connected to my human magnet syndrome work. The union of two people in a romantic relationship is in essence related to each person's own love level. According to human magnet syndrome theories (my books), people feel unconsciously attracted to each other (chemistry) because their mental health is compatible.

Invariably, people with good mental health also love themselves. And on the contrary, people with poor mental health often suffer from love deficit themselves.

Chemical experience (unconscious and reflective romantic attraction) is based on the pairing of both opposite personality types and similar love experience for themselves, or lack of love for themselves. This is the reason why my work of the human magnet syndrome explains that the pathological and co -dependent narcissists always fall in love with each other. Therefore, the force of attraction or "human magnet" is created by unconscious feelings of familiarity and security. The poor love codependent for himself will feel "at home" with the narcissist lacking love for himself.

What can we find when visiting your YouTube channel? Which has many subscribers.

My YouTube channel in English, which already has 5 years of life, has 100 videos that represent my interest in narcissism, narcissistic abuse, codependence, or what I call “love deficit disorder itself”, Traumas, resolution of traumas and many other related issues. In total, these videos have been seen 8 million times. The channel also has 76.000 subscribers.

The Spanish channel is quite new, started about six months ago. It has 32 videos, which have been seen 22.000 times and has collected almost 400 subscribers. The Spanish channel has videos in English with subtitles or with original Spanish content, where I am subtitling.

We know that you have written the book entitled: "The human magnet syndrome: Why do we want those who hurt us?", a best seller in sales, could you talk a little about him?

Since the dawn of civilization, men and women have felt attracted magnetic and irresistibly, not so much for what they see, feel or think, but rather by an invisible and unconscious romantic force. This force of seductive love, attractive and apparently impossible to avoid is the human magnet syndrome. This unites opposite couples in a high -up relationship, but resistant to rupture.

The almost magnetic attraction, or "chemistry", unites codependent and narcissists in a lovely fantasy that will be unsustainable. Over time, the dreams of the codependent of a twin soul will fade away, leaving them with the reality of a cellmate.

The fundamental thesis of the human magnet syndrome is that codependent and pathological narcissists are attracted to each other, due to their opposite but compatible personality types. Sacrificed, patient and selfless codependents dream of falling in love with someone who can love, respect and take care of and completely. His perfect true love fantasy is destroyed when the "love fog" of the human magnet syndrome is clarified and the hidden but evident nature of selfishness and narcissism of his romantic interest is revealed. The same magnetic force that obliges the codependent to deeply fall in love with his narcissistic lover, also "tells" the narcissistic that he (or she) has found his "twin soul" that will attend his emotional and personal wounds, along with giving him infinitely without look forward to.

To the book two chapters of the recently published "Human magnet syndrome have been added: the codependent narcissistic trap" by Rosenberg (2018). These chapters "delivering the witness of the codependence" and "gaslighting and the narcissistic abuse syndrome" illustrate the depth and severity of the human magnet syndrome, while explaining their lasting and apparently intractable nature.

Not having dedicated yourself to this profession, what would you have dedicated to Ross?

When I was young, before deciding to become a psychotherapist, I wanted to be a professional photographer. I think that if it weren't Daltonic, I would have followed that path. Despite having chosen a profession in mental health, I never stopped giving myself to graphic or photographic arts.

Well, thank you very much Ross has really been a real pleasure to be able to do this interview which we greatly appreciate.