The myth of the midfielder

We are quite accustomed and accustomed to hearing that people need to find our half orange to be happy in love and life.

Since we are born we see you bombarded by the so -called "myths of romantic love", through stories (such as the famous Charming prince), The movies, television.

And of all myths related to relationships, the most classic is that of "the half orange". Although the romantic myth can be considered at an overonomasia, the truth is that behind this myth we often encounter the human ambition, with the desire to possess, in which the other person becomes an object, than the fact of Share happiness.

Content

• Where does myth come from?
• The search for half orange can generate a lot of unhappiness
• Idealize the couple
  • Bibliography

Where does myth come from?

Of classical Greece, the origin of the midfield The banquet in which Plato himself teaches the teachings of Aristophanes. This explains how humans were perfect spherical beings and possessed four arms, four legs and two identical faces, one on each side of the head. As these beings believed they dared to challenge the gods and Zeus punished them by two in two. Since then we are wandering the world looking for our other half.

So, When we believe in the midf. But this perfection is impossible since a couple are two people and where there are two people sooner or later will end up conflicts. The issue of falling in love and half orange has a lot to do with the cultural construction we make about love. A historian sociologist of the theme of romantic love is Denis de Rougemont who defends that in Western culture, this half orange is part of our love model and explains it in his essay Love and West.

The search for half orange can generate a lot of unhappiness

This myth that is so Own of Western culture It appears with special force in the sentimental education of women, love would become a project within their lives, without another person they cannot be complete. The great defect of this thought is that two can never be one, and this idea can cause a lot of pain, because there is an idealization of love and real love is not eternal, nor is it perfect, nor does it come to save our lives.

The psychological origin of myth is our fear to loneliness. Since we are babies, if we feel that we are in danger we do our best to be able to feel protected, even dismissing our internal needs if we get to be addressed. This fear of loneliness can make us end up sacrificing a part of our "I" to be accepted by others, so that they do not get angry with us and not be abandoned.

The myth of the midfore comes to reinforce this belief that we need the attention of others to be happy. This is very common to see it in pairs who believe they form an indissoluble whole. It is common to see these couples, for which the passion of the beginning is over and that they no longer feel that they are in love, clinging to the myth since they believe that romantic love will again arise in their lives. They are couples who highly value union to such an extent that it is difficult for them to do things separately. This attempt to merge with the other is not good for either of the two members, On the other hand, what would be advisable is to create a certain distance in the couple to be able to foster a mature marriage, work one's individuality. We alone already complete and do not need another person for it, even if they have sold it to us like this.

Idealize the couple

When we know someone it seems that it is perfect for us and we are surprised at how well we have coupled, then we come to believe the myth. But it is only an initial illusion. Living as a couple is learned and there are never two equal people, And when there are differences, conflicts always end up arising. And if we believe in the half orange is then when we ask ourselves; If we are two halves of the same thing, why don't we understand each other? This can cause great anxiety since we associate the condition of being happy to the half orange.

Thus the big mistake of this myth is to consider us incomplete beings that we can only find fullness when we find love in another person and that if we do not get it we will be unhappy. If we think that only with a relationship we can find happiness we are wrong, happiness is an inner state And only within us we can reach it. All people are complete beings and for a couple to work, their members have to be seen as complete and independent people. And they are together or because they lack anything, but because they want to share their life and happiness, their problems and their sadness.

Bibliography

• Plato (2003). Dialogues. Complete work in 9 volumes. Volume III: Fedón. Feast. Editorial Gredos. Madrid.
• De Rougemont, Denis (1979): Love and West, Editorial Kairós, Barcelona.