When love ends

Love is one of the human dimensions that has generated the most interest throughout history, both in the arts and in science. For many people having a partner and feeling loved is one of the main sources of motivation of their lives. In the background All people want to love and be loved, since it is a Basic need for security, self -esteem and belonging.

Content

• Love and crush are not the same
• Love if it is not taken care of is not eternal
  • Love can with everything?
  • With love, don't you need words?
• The end of love
  • Bibliography

Love and crush are not the same

Although they seem the same, Love and crush are not the same thing. Falling in love is a much more punctual phenomenon in time whose process usually lasts just a few months while love is a feeling that extends over time.

Mainly falling is based on a tension whose origin is uncertainty about what will happen to the other person and the idealization of this, since at the beginning of the relationship we do not know how. So, falling in love is an irrational phenomenon and based on the emotions that appears suddenly, many times without being planned. On the other hand, true love goes further, it is a deep state in which we look and look at others.

Love if it is not taken care of is not eternal

So that love lasts in time we must pamper it every day, if we do not risk being lost the illusion. In addition there are some beliefs that can contribute to the relationship being:

Love can with everything?

Love is linked to the context and if the situation that the couple lives is not the most conducive, the love bond will weaken. For example, if we have exhausting working days, it will be more difficult to devote time to the couple, which will generate wear that will eventually end up ending with the relationship.

Love entails joys but also sacrifices, How to have less time for oneself, invest in common expenses or expose more conflict situations. If this wear is joined by the monotony that entails the passage of time in the relationship, the same customs, the same habits, this can end up generating frustration.

With love, don't you need words?

Daily routine and couple life make it very difficult to convert communication problems into chronic problems and end up generating important misunderstandings.

It is important love oneself to be able to love others. When we have a healthy and broad love it is much easier to find a satisfactory and lasting relationship.

The end of love

Love will end when one or both stop working in the relationship or stop believing in it. Breaking a relationship is a process that will be painful for both members of the couple. Feelings can be very strong and contradictory. The person who decides to take the first step may feel relieved, but also guilty while the other person can feel betrayal and even his self -esteem is affected.

In couple separations there is usually various stages. It is important to know that not everyone has to go through all, because there are many factors that can affect the separation process and the way to face it is different for each person.

• Disappointment. In this first phase the couple or any of the members feel a discontent towards the other person, is when small conflicts begin that do not end up and begin to fantasize with a possible separation.
• Shock stage. One of the members has made the decision to want to separate and the other person is not yet, this does not just assimilate the news and may request to go to couple therapy or seek help in friends or family so that the separation does not occur.
• Decision made of separation. The relationship is over and the dreams shared as a couple fades. The members of the couple begin to distance themselves emotionally and physically and feelings like anger, sadness, guilt appear. It is a period of great instability and anguish for the new future. It is the time when the rupture is made public, which will reaffirm the decision.
• Acceptance of what happened. It begins to accept that the relationship was not entirely healthy and life begins to create a new I independent, with new plans and projects. Although sadness has not yet been abandoned, you begin to see things with a new perspective.
• New life. The situation is accepted and we face the new future with motivation and enthusiasm.

Making the decision to leave a relationship is not easy and we must value pros and cons good. We must be aware that we will spend a stage of grieving until our life is restructured again. Anyway, a break can be learned, and although you are afraid of loneliness, it is a process that the person can be strengthened.

Love is a long path and can sometimes be complicated but sometimes ending the couple means keeping a little love between the two even differently, if we force the situation a lot we can end up breaking what remains forever.

Bibliography

Nan Gottman, John M./Silver. (2010). Seven gold rules to live as a couple. Barcelona: Debolsillo.

Fernando Maureira. (2011). The four components of the relationship. Electronic Journal of Psychology Iztacala, vol 14, page 321-332.