How to know if it is love or obsession

How to know if it is love or obsession

Love is such a deep and great feeling that it is able to alter the chemistry of the organism to such an extent that hormones flood our bloodstream and that gives way to different reactions. The detail is that there is a very thin line between love and obsession, which is often overlooked without measuring the consequences.

Although you can think that love and obsession are the same, the truth is that they are two very different concepts. In healthy relationships, anxiety for the beginning of the relationship disappears over time. Therefore, if your partner or you are not sure of what you feel with the relationship, in this Psychology-online article, we will teach you How to know if it is love or obsession.

You may also be interested: how to know if I have an obsession for an index person
  1. What is love
  2. What is obsession
  3. What are the differences between love and obsession

What is love

Love is an emotion associated with strong feelings of tenderness, affection and affection that manifests towards a person or to something that is loved. According to American Psychological Association (APA)[1], It is an expression that can have different forms, including signs of care and identification towards others, be it the father, mother, children, the couple or friends, among others.

As it is such a broad concept, researchers have raised different theories to explain the types of love, which includes passion, erotic, fraternal, self -este love and other forms that respond to individual perception.

How love manifests

Love is a feeling that Born voluntarily and that tends to put on top of the loved one. It manifests itself through pleasant sensations that are experienced when we are in the presence of the loved one. This also includes physical symptoms such as the increase in oxytocin, pulse acceleration and heart rate, as well as a sensation of calm and peace.

What is obsession

The obsession are repetitive and intrusive thoughts about a fixed idea, which generate uncontrollable impulses that translate into a state of anxiety and permanent insecurity, by imagining negative scenarios in the relationship. It is a highly toxic idealization where the need for absolute control over the couple arises.

How obsession is manifested

With obsession, love with sacrifice and total delivery is confused, which includes passing over the couple's well -being. Who suffers from an obsession, forgets the problems of real life and immerses himself in a spiral of thoughts such as, for example, for infidelity or estrangement, need to control the couple's routines, among other actions that are negative for all types of relationship.

In this article, we tell you how to overcome an obsession with someone.

What are the differences between love and obsession

¿How to know if it is love or obsession? At the beginning of relationships, it is difficult to identify whether it is one thing or the other. However, then you will see the main differences between love and obsession so that, applying emotional intelligence, you know how to identify each of these emotions.

  1. Regarding the consolidation of plans: When there is a healthy love in a relationship, the parties can be dedicated to reaching their own personal development, regardless of the plans they have as a couple. In this sense, the relationship does not limit personal growth. For its part, the obsession tends to restrain individual decisions because they consider that the couple has no right to make their own decisions.
  2. Regarding communication: Love allows people to openly express their emotions, feelings and moods, without the fear of fracturing the relationship. While, with the obsession, communication is limited, since either fear saying what he feels. In addition, obsessives can hardly begin or end the day without talking to the other person, so communication becomes a way to release obsession.
  3. As for your actions: When love is reciprocal and balanced, all parties give and receive equally, they are not even interested in obtaining anything in return, more than their partner's own well -being. For his part, who is obsessed, lives pending to give and give, so he gets overwhelmed his partner in order to receive his approval at all times.
  4. Regarding affection and control: While love is linked to signs of affection and affection, it does not imply absolute control to the beloved person. On the other hand, the obsession goes from affection to the need for control and is linked to a need for authority that has nothing to do with the care and consideration of love.
  5. Regarding individual space:When there is love, couples respect the individual space and try not to interfere with the decisions of the other person, unless requested. With obsession, respect for individual space disappears, which leads to the appearance of jealousy and paranoia for separation.
  6. Regarding self -esteem: Another difference between love and obsession is that love -based relationships are the basis for raising self -esteem, since those involved are complemented and balanced to help find the best version of themselves. While obsession makes the other person perceive as an element that, if not present, makes life no sense.
  7. Regarding reason: When a person is obsessed with another, he will not take the opposite in his actions or ideas, so they are incorrect. This makes it fall into an idealization that can be very negative. While, in health -based relationships, people feel comfort and confidence to be honest, without falling into abuse or disrespect.
  8. Regarding sensations: True love is accompanied by strong and comforting emotions such as love, peace, tranquility, stability, calm, etc. While obsession brings consequences such as the sensation of drowning, asphyxiation and control limitation, which, usually derives in anxiety, stress or separation.
  9. Regarding emotional management: When the person is obsessive, he will not accept a non -response and will not know how to handle rejection. For example, they often threaten to a possible breakdown or carry irrational if the couple asks for a little space. With love, couples can communicate to give their own time and even recognize when they are not compatible to leave the other follow their way.
  10. As for the time with your loved ones:When couples really love each other,They never demanded that the other person move away from their family or friends. But who is obsessive, will claim all the attention of his partner, to the point of prohibiting him to meet or deal with his loved ones.

Also, who really will strive to make you happy, but who is obsessive will want to hurry everything in the relationship to have absolute control of your life. In short, be careful with obsessive relationships and identify them in time to get out of that harmful circle.

This article is merely informative, in psychology-online we have no power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to How to know if it is love or obsession, We recommend that you enter our category of feelings.

References
  1. Dictionary of the American Society of Psychologists (APA). Definition of love. Available at: https: // dictionary.APA.Org/Love
  2. Dictionary of the American Society of Psychologists (APA). Definition of obsession. Available at: https: // dictionary.APA.org/lovehttps: // dictionary.APA.org/obsession