7 tips to deal with criticism

7 tips to deal with criticism

All criticism represents a challenge for most of us, especially for highly sensitive people (PAS), it can become especially devastating.

Sensitive personalities tend to have more intense reactions to criticisms than others less sensitive, and as a result, they often use certain tactics for Avoid facing criticism, How to please people, criticize themselves first (before the other person has the opportunity) and of course, avoid the source of criticism at all costs.

If you are a very sensitive person and fight with the overwhelming thoughts that a criticism produces, here we leave you some of the strategies you can use and that aim to help you cope with them better, in addition to teaching you to grow through these "bad" experiences.

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  • How to face criticism
    • 1. Find out if criticism is constructive or destructive
    • 2.  Do not respond immediately
    • 3. Avoid polarized thinking
    • 4. make questions
    • 5. Look for what is really what they are telling you
    • 6. Separates the feelings of the facts
    • 7. Do something good for yourself

How to face criticism

1. Find out if criticism is constructive or destructive

The difference between constructive and destructive criticism It is the way comments are made. Constructive criticism points out failures but includes tips or suggestions on how they can be corrected, while destructive critic aims to attack directly or tear down the person, and of course, it does not include practical advice.

2.  Do not respond immediately

Our first instinct when we face criticism is to become defensive. Even when you intend to be useful, criticism can feel as a rejection and cause our "struggle or flight" instinct as a natural response. But when we give free rein to our emotions, we often say things that we regret later. The best thing we can do is resist the temptation to respond immediately. It is important then to step back in the situation and think about how it will be processed. Wait until you are quieter and have it clearer before saying anything.

3. Avoid polarized thinking

Many extremely sensitive people have a dual type of thought, in which things are white or black, without half inks. They look like people of great success at a given time, and soon as a complete useless, depending on their most recent achievement or failure. This type of thought prevents people from seeing themselves more comprehensive and at the same time realistic way, composed of both positive and negative features. Let us remain present and give our thoughts a better perspective of reality. Once you have identified an extreme thought, ask yourself, for example: "Where is the evidence that I am the worst of employees throughout the planet?"


4. make questions

It can be easy to misunderstand the slightest negative criticism. So ask to make sure that you completely understand what they are telling you. This is especially important if the criticism received is not too clear. A way to determine if you are correctly interpreting the Feedback, It is paraphrasing the message you have heard and communicate it again to the other person, asking: "Am I understanding this correctly?"

5. Look for what is really what they are telling you

It is said that there is almost always something really in each criticism. Or at least, a person's criticism is a carrier of the truth of how that person who sees you. Try to listen with an open mind, which does not mean that you have to believe it immediately, but maybe you can find something that makes you reflect. For better or worse, other people in our lives often act as mirrors that reflect the things that we cannot see for ourselves. Find a way to use this as an experience of learning to improve.

6. Separates the feelings of the facts

Don't believe everything you feel! Feelings are not the facts, feelings are just that: feelings. They do not always represent what is happening around you. When you listen to criticism, deep feelings of shame, frustration, anger, insufficiency, despair, etc., So it is difficult to perceive the entire situation with perspective, instead of focusing only on those aspects of the situation that are bothering us. Ask yourself if your feelings are based on current reality, In past experiences, or in the fears you have about the future.

7. Do something good for yourself

After receiving a criticism it is not uncommon for our ego to feel as if they had beaten. After this experience you could give you some of self -care, Doing something that helps you calm or even comfort you, you can see a fun movie, take a long bubble bath, read a good book or enjoy your favorite food. If you are kind to yourself when things get complicated, you will realize that it is easier to achieve greater balance and inner tranquility.