10 erroneous beliefs about happiness

Some erroneous beliefs about happiness lead to many people considering that joy is just around the corner. Worse, those who consider that you can only live in a happy way and that suffering is optional, since it is not. Well, Pain is also part of life.

There are also those who believe that happiness consists in feeling joy all the time or having satisfied yearnings, just as there are those who think that accumulating material things contributes such full.

What is happiness?

The word happiness comes from Latin Congratulations, that derives from Felix, and translates as 'fertile' or 'fruitful'. Therefore, Happiness is an emotional state that occurs when there is well -being, conformation or certain objectives have been met, even if each person may have their meaning of this word.

There are many erroneous beliefs about happiness, such as believing that it is an emotion that must be felt all the time, uninterruptedly.

In fact, that would be the first erroneous belief, thinking that being happy is a pleasure that you have to feel at all times and in all places. This does not correspond to reality, then, Happiness rather implies a commitment, a meaning, either with other causes or people, even, it is related to what is called a common good.

Hedonic adaptation leads us to a circle in which we satisfy a desire and then another and another and so on, but that never makes us feel complete because when we adapt to what we already have or have achieved, then it stops producing pleasure.

On some occasions, we also resort to affective prediction, that is, the belief that an event will make us happy for a long time or that bad events will occur in the future full of improbilities. The professor in psychology, Sonja Lyubomirsky, came to affirm: "Nothing in life produces so much joy or causes as much suffering and we believe".

Erroneous beliefs about happiness

Among the erroneous beliefs about happiness we find the following:

1. Accumulate material things gives happiness: Many people believe that this is true and strive to obtain the latest equipment or those most luxurious, but well -being only lasts a short time, because, as mentioned, then the emotion of the euphoria passes and the boredom ensues.
2. Be happy when marrying the right person: This is another of the myths about happiness and the worst thing is that, at the outset, the responsibility of own happiness to another person is already being given. For many people a marriage will give them happiness, but the truth is that, on average, full happiness hard only about two years, then, passionate love can become true if the relationship with other components is nourished.
3. Be happy to have children: Many believe that children bring happiness and, even if they are a gift, we must not romantize it to the point of forgetting that it is rather a great responsibility, which is strenuous.
4. Be happy when you rebuild a relationship: If a couple is over, happiness will not come due to the restoration of affective ties. Again, happiness is placed on someone external, and not on ourselves. In any case, after four years of a break, many experts agree that people are happier than they once were during that union.
5. Happiness will come with success and money: When what is desired, life can become boring and even empty. This explains why many people successfully and money are not happy. Well, happiness does not reside so much in success, but in what we do with it, as well as in money, but in the way of using it. For example, there are people who prefer to spend money to live experiences than to buy objects. It is part of the erroneous beliefs about the happiness that has the most followers.
6. Get the dream job: It is true that doing what is loved brings joy, but all works can be exhausting. When that "perfect" work arrives, the responsibilities come with him and the person realizes that he does not feel the happiness he expected either.
7. Need for a partner: Many think that, having a partner, they can feel happy, but the most curious thing is that many studies indicate that there is more happiness in the single period than during the marriage. This myth costs expensive, then, the person is lost to enjoy the time that passes with their friends, participating in projects and adventures for their own decision, among other advantages.
8. Do not recover from a diagnosis: There are those who enter an office and receive a diagnosis that they did not expect, this sinks them into tears and despair, which is valid, but what should not be sustained is the belief that happiness will never be experienced more, since with A good attitude and optimism can feel joy in life.
9. Believe that the best years of life have culminated: There are those who think that, with the passage of time and the increase in age, the best has remained in the past and fall into sadness or depression, but the truth is that there are many older people who are happier than some young people, and who have the opportunity to rethink life as they wish. Even their emotional situation is more stable and that provides them with enjoyment, since they do not succumb so easily before the difficulties of life.
10. It consists of changing the circumstances: This is another fallacy, the idea that we would only be happy if some events or circumstances change in our lives, because the reality is that the factors that gave us happiness in the past are internal and can also give us happiness in the future and in the now.

Finally, among the erroneous beliefs about happiness, there are people who think that it is had or does not have; The truth is that happiness is not totally anchored to genetic factors, so effort is required.

According to Sonja Lyubomirsky, in his study entitled: becoming happier requires will and an adequate form, sustainable increases in happiness are possible, but only if they are pursued in optimal conditions, such as when people are motivated to perform a positive task, When implying effort and persistence, And when the activity is legitimately effective, that is, that positive expectations and initial motivation are important for the success of any positive activity, but work is also required to carry it out.

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Bibliography

• Moroccan, m., & Cervera, P. (2014). Internalization of the false myths of romantic love in young people.
• Lyubomirsky, s., Dickerhoof, r., Boehm, JK and Sheldon, Km (2011). Being happier requires will and proper form: an experimental longitudinal intervention to boost well -being. Emotion (Washington, DC), 11 (2), 391-402. https: // doi.org/10.1037/A0022575
• Orellana, c. Yo., & Garay, N. (2020). And they lived happily ever after?: Romantic love in commercial film scripts. Theory and Praxis Magazine, 18 (36), 47-90.